Let it go let it flow
Here you can access an audio recording of the newsletter, read by me! Katie!
The unexpected cleanse
So, some of you will know that my partner went away to warmer places for a couple of cold, damp English months, and got back a week earlier than expected.... So that week was supposed to be a "selfless service" week. A cleaning week at the retreat centre he had been to, and his words were, as he told me with glee that he had a lift back to Devon, were along the lines of;
"I may fall into a "guilt cleaning" mode at home, to make up for not doing the selfless service here."
Well, I bet you can guess how that went...
I literally felt like I'd never done a spring clean before! Even the CD's got "sorted" (mostly now in a charity shop) Although as the bubbles may suggest I try to make it a bit more fun than a chore, this was a challenge!
Spring cleaning
So it can be a little unsettling all this cleaning business at springtime, it's like a wave that comes up when you're not expecting it and it thwacks you in the back of the head just when you got accustomed to the temperature of the water.
So this urge appears to be related to the weather changing, the changes of people around you, but I think we've got a bit of sun & it shows up all the dust, and once you see it you can't un-see it.
But the actual action of really cleaning can bring up some pretty uncomfortable feelings, right? for example, going through the kitchen, I honestly didn't ever look at pasta as something that had or even needed a sell by date, (oh my god I sound like my mother. No offence mum)
..so, do I eat it? or do I chuck it?
Quandries!
Is it waste? well, yes definitely. But I find the more one comes across these things, the more brutal one gets, flinging forgotten unloved & sometimes unrecognisable food directly in the wormery- they can deal with it!
Old Teabags
And then there is the tea bag selection, we have an actual fabric bag holding all those colourful little yogi teas, and random little herbal numbers, some of which have been there for quite some time. Despite our best efforts to "share" let's say, with friends and family, there they remain. So I started ploughing through these teas, literally all of the odd ones were horrible & didn't even remotely taste like the ingredients. Folks, don't let your tea bags go off!
So, letting go...
There is a yogic reference to this in Ashtanga yoga, the 5th and final "Yama" (observances) which is - Aparigraha; cling to nothing, let go, "you don't need that do you?" something Marie Kondo is well versed in.
"Aparigraha is often translated as “non-greed,” “non-possessiveness,” and “non-attachment.”
The word “graha” means to take, to seize, or grab. The word “pari” means “on all sides.” And the prefix “a” negatives the word itself, meaning “non.”
Altogether, the word Aparigraha means not taking more than needed."
www.thisisyoga.com.au
And...there are other uncomfortable sensations that aren't as easy to let go of as weird teabags.
Say, ageing... Lets head toward the memory loss bit of ageing as opposed to wrinkles or extra hip weight or whatever, as I feel knowledge seems a bit more valuable and useful to preserve and update...
There is an expression "the books start to leave the library" about memory loss, and sometimes that is exactly what is going on.
I read a thing about the teenage brain, in this book.. (yes, we are all ageing!)
There is a phase where experts describe the brain as "leaves falling off a branch", it is an important phase to be able to let go of un-useful and irrelevant information and memories so that there is room for the new.
Well, this also happens later in life, however the bit of time after the falling leaves may not be quite the same story. So there is a grieving process to be had, and this is not to be underestimated in its gravitas.
However there are perks when one gets a little older, for instance the "not giving a damn what people think " bit that comes when there is a chance you have bumbled, Not sure how often that happens in ones 20's.
Incidentally one "book" definitely fell off my shelf last month it ended up on the website blog page along with the other newsletters, but didn't make it to your inboxes, so here it is is if you fancy heading back into February's musings.
None of us is immune!
I saw a bumper sticker on a bright red car (with lots of dents on it) saying;
"having wild adventures before dementia kicks in"
Yes, a sense of humour is essential, but also seeing the seriousness of well needed care is also required.
TCM & Shavasana &TLC
Traditional Chinese medicine links grieving with the lungs, and the element of metal. An interesting perspective perhaps on the breath, and all the wealth of knowledge around breath, speech and the health of the physical body passed on through time from the sages of the past to now, when perhaps, we need it most.
This observation is also how we can help ourselves in the process of moving through time, because as we all know there is no avoiding the inevitable. Why do you think Shavasana appears at the end of each yoga session?
I have never been to a yoga lesson where there wasn't a good rest at the end, and this rest has a purpose.
I was once told that Shavasana was the most difficult posture to master, but wasn't told why, and had to do my homework:
"As the “corpse pose,” shavasana naturally brings the practitioner to a contemplation of death.
Although it might seem grim at first, meditating on death is actually one of the most uplifting and motivating spiritual practices, because it reminds us of what’s important in life – and of just how precious this human life is.
In a way, the whole spiritual practice can also be seen as a process of dying: the death of the ego.
Ironically, it’s only once this has “died” that we can awaken to life as it really is. Beyond the parts of us that can change and die, what we really are is always alive and is the source of all life.
The process can feel like dying because it demands that we let go of everything that we are identified with, everything that we considered to be ourselves."
https://hridaya-yoga.com/
This is just a small slice of the cake of Shavasana, I recommend a bit of a dive into this stoic practice, it is very illuminating.
But let's take ourselves to the TLC bit, Tender loving care, we all need it, no matter what we say to ourselves. How often does that actually happen? And how does it feel? If you're like many, you may feel a sense of guilt, like you don't deserve this or cant justify it. Well, fine, feel that way if it serves to try another way of bringing that care into your life, Spa days aren't everyones cup of tea! (for example)
But if snuggling up with your cat and good novel really does make you feel rested and great, then that is it!
Ok time to let go!
xx